We would like to take this moment to reassure our fans that despite what has continued to be written about us by one publication, which we shall not name, we are very much real.
"Personally, I've always existed, as far as I'm concerned and I defy anyone to convince me otherwise," adds Jack Kane (drummer).
"Unless this is all actually somebody's dream or something," clarifies Phil Voorhees (bass).
"Sure, there's that. So...let me just add then, we most certainly exist...unless we are all a part of someone else's dream."
"What if this is all just an illusion designed to enable the repayment of our karmic debts towards the realization of nirvana?"
"Well, that's entirely possible, isn't it? But, in all other cases, in this day and age, we will not stand for a media that depersonalizes our very personal selves!" states Kane.
"It's better sitting down, isn't it?" concludes Voorhees. "That's what oma Pam always used to say..."
Thank you.